Usually when I bring the beginnings of repentance for my sins to prayer, I sense a deeper call to repentance. (In other words, when I begin to repent in prayer, I find I’m not repenting nearly enough.) Lately, I have been trying to bring to prayer the shame I have that I come to such radically different conclusions than almost all other priests online on the issues of 2021.
Going to prayer, I expect to feel more shame for these differences of opinion I have with most of the hierarchy.
But amazingly (and I realize what we sense in prayer is by no means infallible and probably shouldn’t even go in a blog) I have been feeling great courage in prayer to “keep going” in defending Apostolic Catholicism as I try to apply the Gospel of Jesus Christ to the issues of Church and State in 2021. Yes, as I try to bring to prayer the accusations to me that I am an “extremist” or “troublemaker” (and thus expect a further rebuke from heaven) I keep getting led back to this line: For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.—2 Tim 1:7
I currently feel very deep repentance and shame for the actual sins of my past, but I am now sense in prayer: I am not to repent for standing up for Apostolic Catholicism online. Thus, not only am I not going to repent for resisting the pandemic of doctrinal error, but I am going to double-down in my 2020 level of courage now in 2021. I recently came across Bl. Jacinta Marto’s parting words to Sr. Lucy of Fatima just before Jacinta died at age 9 about 100 years ago in 1920. Jacinta said:
“Soon I will go to Heaven. You stay here to tell people that God wants to establish devotion to the Immaculate Heart of Mary in the world. When you say it, don’t hide. Tell all the people that God grants all the graces through the Immaculate Heart of Mary. Ask her for it because the Heart of Jesus desires, next to His Heart, the Immaculate Heart of Mary to be venerated. Ask the Immaculate Heart for peace, for God has confided this to her. If only I could put in the hearts of people the light that I have inside my heart; this light embraces me and allows me to taste so much of the Hearts of Jesus and Mary.”
Again, Bl. Jacinta Marto who saw Our Lady at Fatima said: “When you say it, don’t hide!” That needs to be the message for all Catholics alive today who put truth before a peace-pact with the devil (a peace-pact he will never fulfill. So, when you say it, don’t hide. One of the many dozens of examples to apply this to is standing in resistance to the fake elections found in State and Church as these divert true obedience. Perhaps it was a good start to sheepishly stick to your guns in the odd days of 2020 last year, but now in 2021 you need to double-down in the truth. You need to convince your loved ones. Or at least, do your best in peace and charity. As St. Bernadette once said, “My job is to inform, not to convince.”
If you have the time, I highly encourage you to listen to recent sermon from an FSSP priest who spoke on common-sense and obedience. The following sermon especially demonstrates why we all need to use our brains to figure out the right thing to do in 2021 instead of just fall behind our favorite Churchy-celebrity: